Many assumptions are made when a couple decides to divorce. People outside the relationship may assume why it happened, and those experiencing the divorce might make assumptions about how things will turn out.
An interesting Huffington Post article takes a look at common divorce myths. Specifically, the writer attempts to debunk three myths regarding children and divorce.
One myth is that the children will be fine. It’s quite possible that kids will be fine after their parents go through a divorce, but that doesn’t mean it happens magically and doesn’t require help from the parents.
Some children may very well be resilient on their own, but they will be helped immensely if their parents make an effort to reduce conflict, before and after a divorce, and especially during the process.
Another common belief is that children assume their parents’ divorce is not about them. Not so, the Post writer says. Kids are essentially the centers of their own universe, and assuming that kids don’t think the divorce revolves around them can be naïve. Unfortunately, children might think they did something to cause their parents to separate, and a little assurance can go a long way.
One more myth is that children do not notice that their parents are fighting or that a conflict is happening. But children are perceptive not only to what parents say, but to how they act and what body language they use. Parents should be careful in the way they communicate.
Divorce is a challenging process for the entire family, and it’s important that parents are sensitive to what their children are going through.
Source: Huffington Post, “The kids will be just fine and other divorce myths,” Claire N. Barnes, Feb. 3, 2012