When working with our Morris County divorce clients, one of the most common questions they have for us is if we think they should actually pursue a divorce, or try to save their marriage. Unfortunately, there is usually no easy or one-size-fits-all answer to this question.
Of course, if one partner has a new romantic relationship, or if there are domestic violence or abuse issues, the marriage should likely end. On the other hand, many times our clients don’t even know how their marriage got to the point of potentially ending in divorce, or what to do about it.
While we are not marriage counselors, we can provide some guidance when it comes to making such a crucial decision, and some potential resources you can tap when it comes to helping you keep your marriage together.
Identify That There Is a Problem
Chester, NJ Divorce Attorneys
You cannot fix something if you do not first identify that it is broken, and this is especially true for a marriage. However, rather than saying what exactly you believe those problems to be (as this can easily result in just another argument), it is better to instead see if your spouse agrees that something in your marriage is fundamentally not working.
Sometimes it can be the case that they really don’t realize how bad things have gotten between you. Or, they may agree with you, at which point you can take some steps to try and decide if they marriage is worth saving, and how you might be able to do it.
Things That Definitely Won’t Save Your Marriage
Mendham, NJ Divorce Lawyers
Many times, married couples think that changes like having a kid, moving, or some other surface level change will save their marriage. In our experience as divorce lawyers, this is never the case. The issues in your marriage which are causing one party or the other to consider divorce are not going to go away with any of these changes, and may even be exacerbated in many cases by such changes.
The point is, if there are problems in your marriage which are causing one or both spouses to want to divorce, professional help is the only thing that may be able to save the marriage, not having another child or some other change in your routine or circumstance.
Seek Professional Help
Chatham, NJ Family Law Firm
If you and your spouse agree that your marriage is worth saving, its probably going to take professional help to do so if it is gotten to the point that one party or the other.
However, this help can take many different forms. For example, some couples may find success with marriage counseling or other types of therapy. For others, the support and guidance your church or clergy can provide can be a potential solution. Lastly, simply asking for close friends and family members to intervene and help you discuss your issues and potential solutions can be of benefit.
Contact Our Morris County Divorce Attorneys Today
With all this being said, not every marriage will succeed, no matter the steps taken or efforts made. When this is the case, and a divorce does become necessary, it is highly important that you retain experienced legal counsel during this process in order to help you resolve the key divorce issues of child custody, child support, alimony, and marital asset division which protects the unique needs, interests, and concerns of you and your family and children.
At The Law Office of Townsend, Tomaio & Newmark, our attorneys have extensive experience helping clients to resolve their divorce through a variety of means such as negotiation, mediation, arbitration, collaboration, and litigation in towns across New Jersey and Morris County, including Chester, Mendham, Chatham, Harding, Morris Township, and Morristown.
To speak with our effective and knowledgeable legal team today in a free and confidential consultation regarding your divorce, any of its related issues, or a post-divorce modification or family law appeal, please contact us online, or through our Morristown, NJ office at (973) 828-0829.