In many New Jersey divorces, child custody becomes a hot-button issue. Parents often differ in their goals for child custody and parenting time. They also frequently have different visions of “the best interests of the child.”
Sometimes, an older child has strong feelings about which parent they want to live with. Parents in this situation often ask: “How old does my child have to be to decide the custody arrangement?” The short answer is that there is no fixed age. New Jersey family law provides guidelines rather than hard and fast rules. Courts apply these on a case-by-case basis using established case law.
Custodial vs. Non-Custodial Parents
In the vast majority of New Jersey arrangements, one parent is the custodial parent. The other is the “non-custodial parent” and is awarded parenting time or visitation. These terms refer to the time the child spends with the parent who does not have sole legal custody. “Parenting time” is a modern term. it emphasizes that the parent is participating in parenting rather than just “visiting.”
Courts may restrict parenting time if it is not in the best interests of the child. Common reasons for restrictions include:
- Substance abuse problems.
- A history of domestic violence.
- Prior negligence in the child’s care.
The “Unwritten Rule” of Age 14
Many New Jersey attorneys follow an unwritten rule that a child’s influence carries more weight at age 14. However, this is only a suggestion. Maturity can allow for a child’s influence at a younger age. The 2013 case of Deane v. Deane provides insight into this issue. In that case, a judge determined a 12-year-old was mature enough to decide she no longer wanted overnight visits with her father.
Statutory Factors for Child Custody (N.J.S.A. 9:2-4(c))
According to N.J.S.A. 9:2-4(c), New Jersey courts must consider 14 specific factors before making a custody determination:
- The parents’ ability to communicate and cooperate.
- Willingness to encourage a strong relationship with the other parent.
- The child’s relationship with each parent and siblings.
- The child’s safety in each parent’s care.
- The child’s specific needs.
- The stability of each home environment.
- The quality and continuity of the child’s education.
- The child’s preference (if of sufficient age and capacity to reason).
- The fitness of each parent.
- Geographical proximity of the parents’ homes.
- The parents’ employment responsibilities.
- Time spent with the child prior to separation.
- The age of each child.
- Any history of domestic abuse.
The factor regarding “sufficient age and capacity to reason” gives judges significant discretion. It allows them to evaluate the specific maturity of the child in question.
How a Child’s Voice is Heard in Court
It is highly unusual for a child to testify in a custody trial. Such events are often stressful and traumatic. Instead, a child’s desires are typically voiced through other means:
- Judicial Interviews: A judge may conduct a separate, private interview with the child. Attorneys can provide questions, and the interview is recorded for the court transcript.
- Guardian Ad Litem: The court can appoint a representative to protect the child’s best interests. This person speaks with the child and communicates their needs to the court.
Our New Jersey divorce attorneys have extensive experience in high-conflict custody cases. Several of our lawyers have served as court-appointed guardians ad litem and parent coordinators. For a free consultation, contact us today at 973-840-8970.
