For parents going through a divorce, the safety, happiness, and wellbeing of their children is a top priority. While the many legal concerns of divorce such as alimony, division of marital assets, child custody and so forth are extremely important, it is also vital that children are given a consistent and loving environment during and after the divorce process. No two families are exactly alike and therefore there is no one size fits all solution. However, there are certainly some high level recommendations our divorce lawyers can offer based on decades of research and study of family dynamics throughout the divorce process.
Today, we will review how consistency in scheduling and behavior can make the transition easier for children as well as some other high level tips to make co-parenting after a divorce easier on everyone involved.
Consistency and Parenting Schedules in Morris County, NJ
Research has repeatedly shown that consistency is amongst the most important variables which co-parents can control to help their children through the divorce process. Children may be concerned that their lives will be dramatically changed now that their parents are no longer living together. Our Morris County divorce lawyers have seen the following help co-parents navigate parenting both during and after divorce:
Detailed and consistent parenting schedules within a child custody agreement. There are no hard and fast rules which dictate how specific child custody agreements should be in New Jersey. However, it is worth considering that more detailed schedules in writing may allow co-parents and children to fall into a groove and become comfortable with the new schedule.
Drafting temporary child custody agreements. Time does not stop during a divorce. Children must still get to school, do their homework, soccer practice, and everything else. Many co-parents find temporary custody agreements beneficial to hash out the scheduling issues while the divorce process is ongoing.
Chester Child Custody Lawyers Discuss Co-Parenting After Divorce
After your divorce has been formalized, the dust still may be settling from a personal perspective. Our Chester child custody lawyers understand that this can be difficult to navigate for parents who are trying their best to care for children while working through their own personal issues. Here are some simple tips for co-parents to keep in mind which will benefit both themselves and their children.
- Keep communication open and civil between co-parents. As well planned out as your schedule may be, things happen. Trying to work together in a reasonable manner can make co-parenting much easier
- Do not let personal feelings interfere with parenting. While we hope this isn’t the case, some co-parents are still very angry or upset about the divorce for months or even years. Your children are sensitive to your actions and words. If you need an outlet to vent, do so with friends, other family members, or with the help of a professional such as a therapist
- Never put children in the middle. Even if it is seemingly innocuous (tell mom blah blah), children should not be used as messengers or go betweens
- Parent consistently. Children may be going back and forth between two homes, but the rules and expectations in both homes should be consistent to avoid confusion
There are many, many more ways in which co-parenting can be successfully managed. Many of our clients have found success working with parenting specialists and/or mental health professionals to help with this difficult time.
Questions About Parenting and Divorce? Contact our Morristown Divorce Attorneys Today
The divorce attorneys of Townsend, Tomaio & Newmark have extensive experience working with co-parents to resolve their child custody and other parenting issues in local Morris County towns including Morristown, Chatham, Chester, Harding, Morris Township, Mendham, and all of Northern New Jersey. We are proud to offer alternatives to traditional litigation such as mediation and collaborative divorce, which may also have the fringe benefit of causing less stress to children during divorce proceedings.
For more information on co-parenting during and after divorce, please contact us online or call our Morristown, NJ offices today at (973) 828-0829 for a free and confidential consultation with a member of our qualified and experienced legal team.